Britain’s Premature Exit From EU Could Leave Country With Sperm Shortage

The UK voted to leave the EU in June 2016, but it's still having a bit of difficulty working out the kinks of that process. Brexit Secretary Dominic Raab said at a Thursday news conference that the prospect of the United Kingdom leaving the European Union without a negotiated deal is "unlikely," but the government nonetheless published technical notes on the consequences of barren negotiations.

A no-deal Brexit is expected to increase credit card charges for UK citizens in the EU and generally increase bureaucracy, but it's no apocalypse scenario. Raab tried to quell worried speculation on Thursday, railing against reports that there could be food shortages. But the government is asking pharmaceutical companies to stockpile medicines.

Perishable ones, such as insulin, are particularly at risk.

But much of the attention online has been directed to the potential for a sperm shortage. Sputnik News will spare you the details of some of the chatter, as it's just too, well, seedy.

"UK licensed establishments working in this area, such as hospitals stem cell laboratories, tissue banks and fertility clinics would continue to work to the same quality and safety standards as they did before exist but some would need new written agreements with relevant EU establishments," the British government warned in its technical notes.

Twitter user Paul Masterman tweeted, "On a lighter note, it turns out that in the event of no deal, we might have to start producing more of our own sperm for donation and not rely on the Danes."

That's OK though, because political commentator Mike Holden replied that he's already "on it."

Ed Morris noted the potential for a "growth industry."

In another thread, James Mendelsohn called for "British jobs for British wankers."

Femi Oluwole, a founder of an anti-Brexit activist group, wrote that his mind is "just fertile with jokes for this." In an effort to remain professional, Oluwole elected to take "preventative measures." Instead, he tweeted an article to "let the seed grow in your minds."